Understanding how different people respond to feedback
Understanding how different people respond to feedback
5 minutes
Feedback is a core component of personal and professional growth, providing valuable insights into our strengths and areas for improvement. However, not everyone responds to feedback in the same way. Reactions to feedback can vary greatly depending on the individual, the nature of the feedback, and the context in which it is given.
Some people are open to feedback and accept it willingly, seeing it as an opportunity for growth and improvement. Others may react defensively, feeling threatened or criticised by the feedback. In some cases, they may feel resentful or angry in response to feedback, particularly if they perceive it as unjust or unfair.
Some people may take time to reflect on the feedback they’ve received, considering its validity and implications. There are those who choose to dismiss feedback altogether, either because they disagree with it or because they don’t see the value in implementing the suggested changes.
However, these reactions are not mutually exclusive, and people may experience a combination of them depending on the specific circumstances surrounding the feedback and their own personality traits and coping mechanisms.
The feedback matrix is a structured tool used to evaluate and provide feedback on individual performance or other relevant criteria. It is designed to help individuals process and utilise feedback more effectively, particularly by mitigating emotional responses that could possibly hinder growth and improvement. As a leader, it can help you understand why your team member is processing feedback in a certain way. It comprises four distinct quadrants, each representing different types of feedback:
This quadrant involves feedback that confirms what a person already knows about themselves– that they’re good at what you do. It is like getting a pat on the back for something they already feel confident about. For instance, if they’re really good at a task and you tell them how awesome they did, that’s the type of feedback we’re talking about here.
The key here is not to dismiss this feedback as trivial but rather to consider how to further leverage these known strengths for personal and professional growth. Here are questions you can ask someone you’re giving feedback to:
- How can you continue to excel in this area?
- How can you use this strength to benefit the team or organisation?
Unlike the positive/expected quadrant, this quadrant refers to feedback that addresses areas where improvement is anticipated or already recognised by the person. It includes criticism or suggestions for growth that align with the individual’s self-awareness regarding their weaknesses or areas needing development.
For instance, if someone struggles with time management and frequently receives feedback on missed deadlines, this won’t be new information for them. Rather than becoming defensive or discouraged, individuals should reflect on this feedback and consider actionable steps for improvement.
Here are questions you can ask someone you’re giving feedback to:
- What strategies have you already tried to address this issue?
- What additional steps can you take to improve in this area?
This quadrant involves feedback that surprises the individual by highlighting strengths or accomplishments they hadn’t fully recognised or appreciated. Praises or recognition for aspects of performance or behaviour that were unexpected but positively received are categorised in this quadrant.
For example, if a person receives unexpected compliments on their leadership skills, such feedback would fall into this category. People who get this feedback should reflect on it to better understand their capabilities and consider how to capitalise on their newfound strengths.
Here are questions you can ask someone you’re giving feedback to:
- Why was this aspect of your performance unexpected?
- How can you further develop and leverage this skill in the future?
This involves feedback that catches the person off guard by highlighting areas of weakness or shortcomings they hadn’t previously recognised or acknowledged. It includes criticism or feedback that challenges the individual’s self-perception or expectations.
Despite the initial discomfort, people should approach this feedback with openness and a willingness to learn. Here are questions you can ask someone you’re giving feedback to:
- What additional information or context do I need to better understand this feedback?
- How can I use this feedback as an opportunity for personal growth and development?
By categorising feedback into these four quadrants, people can systematically evaluate and respond to feedback more constructively and objectively. This approach helps leaders to recognize patterns in the reaction that they receive, understand how the feedback impacts each team member, and then and then leverage this insight to tailor their leadership approach accordingly.
By categorising feedback into positive/expected, negative/expected, positive/unexpected, and negative/unexpected, leaders can ensure that their feedback is balanced and comprehensive. This approach encourages open dialogue and enables leaders to provide constructive feedback that supports the development of their team members.
They can use the matrix to identify patterns of feedback within their team and address any common challenges or areas for improvement. By analysing the distribution of feedback across the four quadrants, leaders can identify trends and develop targeted strategies to enhance team performance.
Most importantly, the matrix is a useful coaching tool to help team members process and respond to feedback. By guiding team members through the process of categorising feedback and reflecting on its implications, leaders can support their growth and development.
